Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in markedformetal's LiveJournal:

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Saturday, May 10th, 2008
2:30 pm	r e m i n d e r: tonight tonight tonight! Your presence cordially requested: 7:30pm Elliot Bay Book Company 101 South Main Street Seattle, WA 98104 (206) 624-6600 The reading starts at 7:30pm but get there early, because I just bought a bunch of cheap wine and you should come and drink some with me before the thing! Current Mood: magically delicious Current Music: mindless self indulgence (22 Comments |Comment on this)
Thursday, May 8th, 2008
9:27 pm	hurray for hedonism! Seattle On The Fringe write-up. Current Mood: silly Current Music: "planet of the apes" on tv (14 Comments |Comment on this)
Sunday, May 4th, 2008
10:53 am	my brand spankin' new sex advice column! Go here. You'll have to make up a user name and password, but then you can read all the articles I have up on the site (and man, I have a lot!). The administrator promises that all the registration issues have been hammered out, so there should be no further problems logging on and getting immediate access to the site. If you do have any technical issues, contact the Daily Sex Scoop site administrator immediately (not me, because I have nothing to do with DSS other than supplying articles for your delectation--I'm sure as hell not a competent techie!). Now is the part where I beg you for questions to answer in my sex advice column. What do you want to know? What are you curious about? It's all anonymous and I promise not to out you. Send all queries--from silly to serious--to me at sarah@sarahkatherinelewis.com. Thank you! ***** Also, don't forget to click here for information about my Seattle readings on May 10th and May 12th! Be there or be soy sausage! Current Mood: busy Current Music: nada
Saturday, May 3rd, 2008
3:38 pm	two seattle readings! Attention Seattle peeps! Please come to my readings! They will include bacon-tinged hijinks, boob signings, lots of profanity, and possibly free cheap wine. Don't stay home and make me read to three homeless people and one psychotic heckler. Seriously--that is my nightmare. I'm so scared nobody will come. So please please come, and bring friends! At the very least you can laugh at me when I blush over the word "analingus." Saturday, May 10th, at 7:30pm--Elliot Bay Book Company. Monday, May 12th, at 7pm--Third Place Books (Ravenna branch). (Scroll down to May Events.) Please repost if you like my latest book, Sex & Bacon, or my last book, Indecent. And THANK YOU for helping me spread the word. Current Mood: nervous Current Music: glenn fucking danzig (39 Comments |Comment on this)
2:24 am	me modeling plastic pants... ...for tonyawinter's 10th anniversary fetish-wear fashion show. I'm making carrot-squash soup and drinking $7 shiraz. That is all. (42 Comments |Comment on this)
Friday, May 2nd, 2008
5:26 pm	good news/bad news So I got the day off today. No need of my nannying services for the X family, for reasons that aren't mine to reveal. The good news: an unscheduled day off! Yay! The bad news: loss of a day's pay. Boo. I'll probably have tomorrow off too. And possibly Thursday. I just finished posting a bunch of clothes for sale on Velvet Garden. If you like shiny shiny PVC (and lush, sexy velvet) you should sign up for Alison's mailing list and check out my stuff when she updates, which should be today or tomorrow! (They're listed under my email handle--Markedformetal--and my merchandise fits curvy dames, so if you're skinny you're outta luck, sis.) My stuff's good--it's just too big for me and I need the mon-eh. In good spirits, though, all told. Also, I hear that the economic stimulus "Blood for Oil" checks are in the mail. Supposedly us unmarried types are getting, like, $300. DUDE. Bush has my vote! Current Mood: somewhat merry despite it all Current Music: "15 acts of shocking violence" on e!. i'm not making this up. (43 Comments |Comment on this)
Thursday, May 1st, 2008
2:35 am	haut-chocolat! MARISSA D.--THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU. Holy moly. I'm overcome with choco-lust and gratitude. Current Mood: sated (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, April 29th, 2008
8:25 pm	watching mr and mrs smith on tv Thanks but no thanks, Hollywood.
Wednesday, April 23rd, 2008
10:02 pm	true stories Hey, Seattle folk: you should come to the Jewelbox Theatre (in Belltown's historic Rendezvous Bar) for some STORYTELLING. Storytelling, you say? Yes, storytelling! No notes, no scripts, nothing but pure storytelling goodness--people getting up on stage and telling actual autobiographical true STORIES, and let me tell you, I went to rehearsal and these stories are hil-freakin'-arious. I laughed so hard I thought I'd pee. My dear friend escaaapefromla will be performing, and his story of how his father taught him to drive a manual transmission--complete with international intrigue, a hot Tokyo go-go dancer, and a stint in Japanese jail--will have you spit-taking your drink (so don't buy top shelf til after the show). Here's the deal: Thursday, April 24th--arrive at 7pm, show at 7:30pm Jewelbox Theatre in the Rendezvous I'll be there. You be there too! ***** In other news, my new book Sex & Bacon is officially out! You should buy it. Or request it from your local library. And if you've already read it and liked it, I would be very grateful for your review on Amazon. As usual, my ad budget is nil so the only way I'm selling my book is good word-of-mouth. Reviews really, really help. While you're at it, you should pre-order F*cking Daphne: Mostly True Stories and Fictions (June 2008) because there are some good, nasty stories in it (including one by me that should get me a ream of hate mail). ***** I'm super-tired and I really wanted to write a catch-up post but screw it, I'm going to bed. Soon! I promise! Things are fine, I'm just busy and happy-ish and booked up til the end of the damn month. Also I'm craving peanut M&Ms again. DAMN IT, you candy hoydens! Leave me alone! I don't want to eat you every day! Can't you understand, I don't want to end up flesh-bonding to my own couch? Okay. Bed. NOW. Current Mood: sleeeeeeeepy Current Music: razed in black (46 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, April 9th, 2008
4:16 am	i just had the gothiest dream ev-ar A suitor gave me a gift. It was a bracelet with a blue plastic dog tag attached, featuring an official-looking caduceus image on one side and Do Not Resuscitate in large, emphatic letters on the other side. I was touched. I kissed him again and again as he tenderly fastened his gift around my wrist. Current Mood: back to sleep now, hey Current Music: voltaire: "when you're evil" (29 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, April 7th, 2008
4:24 pm	i'll fuck you without a condom any day, bookslut I love to love you, Bookslut. (With bacon-flavored kisses to pdxgrrrl for linking me to this review.) Current Mood: gobsmacked and giggly Current Music: specimen: "kiss kiss bang bang" (48 Comments |Comment on this)
Saturday, March 29th, 2008
1:28 am	goin' to portland No computer access. Back Sunday. Will be seeing some of you at the Ball, yes? And others of you for dahn-cing on Sunday night in Seattle? Current Mood: dirty, but in a good way Current Music: television: "see no evil"
Thursday, March 27th, 2008
7:58 pm	yowza! booklist likes me too! Sex and Bacon: Why I Love Things That Are Very, Very Bad for Me. Lewis, Sarah Katherine (Author) May 2008. 26 p. Seal, paperback, $14.95. (9781580052283). 394.1. Lewis, a former sex worker, has a lusty appetite for both food and sex. In these short essays, she offers raunchy tales from the front lines of the sex industry along with some of her favorite recipes and experiences in adventurous eating. One piece discusses the happy outcome of her personal ad requesting the services of a female dominatrix, while another offers directions for preparing a romantic dinner of mussels and shallots. She also roams further afield, offering a spirited defense of Britney Spears as a woman condemned for indulging her appetites for bad boys and junk food, an interesting take on the tyranny of body image, and a painfully candid but poignant piece on breaking up with her boyfriend. If the pieces don’t always mesh well—it’s a tad disconcerting to segue from the fetish of pee drinking to the drudgery of office work—Lewis certainly makes for thought-provoking reading. She’s very frank—some would label her crude—about all aspects of sexuality, and she displays an open contempt for her former customers, though not for her former coworkers. Provocative reading. — Joanne Wilkinson _____ I don't know--I find office work to be quite similar to pee-drinking, actually. _____ [EDIT: Oh, and Straight People? Just to set the record straight: taking out a personal ad in Girls Seeking Girls looking for a "Daddy" is not the same thing as trying to hire a "female dominatrix." Just FYI.] Current Mood: bubblin' crude Current Music: duran duran: "hold back the rain" (30 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, March 26th, 2008
4:46 pm	now what? Finished my advice column for April and an article on muff-diving for str8 grlz. Cleaned tub, sink, and toilet. Mopped kitchen and bathroom. Now what? Oh, I know! Time to take pictures and write descriptions of various articles of clothing I have that I need to sell. I'm so sick of the pile of clothing here on my trunk. Ugh. tircha, will you send me your mailing address again? I have two more unsellable long-sleevity shirts for you, if you want 'em! markedformetal at yahoo, as always. :) Current Mood: busy busy (4 Comments |Comment on this)
1:56 pm	oh, and Here's the official Publisher's Weekly review for my next book, which will be coming out in May 2008: _____ Sex and Bacon: Why I Love Things That Are Very, Very Bad for Me Sarah Katherine Lewis. Seal, $14.95 paper (256p) ISBN 978-1-58005-228-3 Lewis's first book, Indecent: How I Make It and Fake It as a Girl for Hire, focused on her career in the sex industry; her latest offering includes some sex stories but marries them to a new theme: eating for pleasure. As Lewis points out, we're so obsessed with needing to lose weight that we eat pseudo-food, which offers little satisfaction. Lewis suggests, instead, frying up some chicken or corncakes for your dinner date, and then taking him or her to bed for some great sex. Lewis can't stop herself from speculating on whether his body fluids or her "cooch" will taste garlicky, which is in keeping with her penchant for considering a lover's body as a sort of naked lunch. Her explicit rejection of condom use may outrage or upset some readers, but--in the same way that she celebrates bacon, sausage, whale meat and other politically incorrect food--Lewis is not interested in pleasing everyone. While her food discourses--particularly the how-to chapters--are often inspired, and her politics delightfully pleasure-positive, the many raunchy sex passages, though written with a joyful sensuality and a dash of humor, are not for everyone. (May) _____ So glad I didn't get the same reviewer I drew for Indecent, who hated every word I wrote, including and and the. And now is the time where I solicit help for my tour: if you would like to book me to read and sign at your bookstore, college campus, meat-rendering factory, preschool, or halfway house, please contact my agent at this address: skbooking@audioaccidents.com All interview requests--radio, print, podcast, zine, etc.--should be directed to the address above as well. Please forward this to anyone you know who might want to help me promote my book. This is DIY, babies--my tour budget is nil and my ad budget is minus nil, so I'm relying on word-of-mouth. Current Mood: busy busy Current Music: the yeah yeah yeahs: "maps" (shut up, i like this song) (29 Comments |Comment on this)
Thursday, March 20th, 2008
8:46 pm	lj strike = friday, march 21 I've never crossed a picket line and I don't intend to do so now. Thank you for the image, constantina! Current Music: mindless self indulgence: "wack!"
Sunday, March 16th, 2008
3:30 pm	twisted spitzer article is up "So let me get this straight: a politician spends an obscene amount of money screwing hookers, lies about it for years, is enabled by an oblivious family and a staff paid to keep mum, and is finally busted in a headline-making scandal. Surprised? No. The only shocker is that more wealthy, educated politicians aren't caught with their greasy little paws in our national cookie jar, buying prostitutes and drugs and rough-trade "massage therapists" and whatever else they need to get their freak on after a long day of sticking it to their constituents. The only thing that raised my eyebrow in New York ex-governor Spitzer's case is the $4,300 he reputedly spent in one single night, since that sum is so out of line with the standard market rates for even the most complicated and risky sexual service. If Mr. Spitzer and his courtesan weren't sacrificing goats to Satan and drinking the blood of immortal damnation, he was being overcharged." (Complete article here: Twisted Spitzer) Warning--you will have to make up a user name and password to access this site, but it only takes a minute and then you can read all the other articles I have up, too. [3rd EDIT, 7:23pm: The site's experiencing a huge amount of traffic right now so for right now, be patient. Your password should show up soon! Or, ping the site administrator under "Contact Me" and let him know. This isn't my site so I can't troubleshoot registration issues, unfortunately.] Hand Job Tips For Ladies A String Of Pearls: Tit-Fucking For The Masses A Schoolgirl At Any Age Now I Wanna Be Your Dog: D & S For Beginners A Beginner's Guide To Spanking Spanking It, Part II: Implements Makin' Up For Makin' Out Angel Is A Centerfold: Tricks To Look Your Best For Boudoir Photography The Tender Trap: How To Avoid Being "Just Friends" My Naughtiest New Year's Resolutions If His Fridge Could Talk Clips And Clamps: Turning "OW!" Into "Ohhhh..." Motel Six Sex How To Strip For Your Partner (Part I) How To Strip For Your Partner (Part II) and finally, the first installment of my advice column, Ask Sarah. _____ [EDIT: I had a fabulous Saturday night--thanks to all of you who came out, and thanks especially to the excellent goth/industrial band Deathbed Repenetance and Seattle's own spooooooooky Eternal Darkness. Thank you for making me feel glamorous and appreciated, you guys.] _____ [2nd EDIT, 4:53pm: And yes, dahn-cing at Noc Noc tonight is GO. I'll be there to stomp around 9:30 or 10pm. Your presence is cordially requested but save the club drama for your mama, and no hooker shoes unless you're a tranny or a crossdresser.] (46 Comments |Comment on this)
1:32 am	was out being a surly rock star thank you very much Drinking for free rules, as does my new silver and black cincher. Okay but now it's time to wash my face and do my pinkeye eyedrops so it's not like I'm not being totally humbled. Current Music: ministry: "thieves"
Friday, March 14th, 2008
2:30 pm	NAME MY PODCAST Okey dokey. I'm gonna be doing a regular podcast, and I need a smashing name for it. ("The Sarah Katherine Lewis Show," while accurate, is an example of a name that is not smashing.) Two possible podcast titles I've thought of are "Key Party" and "That Not-So-Fresh Feeling." But neither of those make me totally overjoyed--the first is a bit obscure unless you grew up watching "Three's Company" reruns every day after school the way I did, and the second's a little too Riot Grrrl 1992 and might alienate male listeners scared of ritual uncleanliness. So knock me out with your suggestions: the one that's chosen for use will be rewarded with a free autographed copy of "Sex & Bacon" from my author's copy stash, plus other assorted goodies I haven't figured out yet but trust me, you'll want them. Yep, it's a contest. Think funny, think sexy, think literary, think gross. I'm sure you can do better than the two I made up--you people are SMRT. I'm home sick with a bad cold and conjunctivitis (YES: PINKEYE). The good news is, I went to the doc and got some antibiotic eyedrops so I should be okay by tomorrow. The bad news is, if you want pinkeye you have to act fast. If you want it, come right over and I'll caress your eyeballs with my pinkeye fingers. But this offer can't last long. Current Mood: cough-y Current Music: mix cd of true outstandingness (60 Comments |Comment on this)
Thursday, March 13th, 2008
8:12 pm	"heavy breathing"? Scroll down to New Products (March 10,2008). WOULD WOMEN RATHER HAVE SEX OR CHOCOLATE ... With their bacon? Maybe I’m a big perv, but I don’t see anything wrong with having all three at once in a great big pile-up, as long as everyone talks about their boundaries and expectations first. Current Mood: hungry Current Music: priestess: "i am the night, color me black" (23 Comments |Comment on this)